Friday - Rejection - and getting molested.

So I realize that I’m really bad at keeping on top of this.

My head is full of shit right now. I have to let it out.

So after work on Friday, I went tanning and then got my nails done, mostly preparing for the weekend date that I was supposed to have at the "W" in San Diego. Yeah, whatever. Then I went to Stephanie's little birthday bash at some random place in Carlsbad. What I really wanted to do was just go out with Steph, but we can't always get what we want. I had a lot of fun seeing all my friends and I even met Todd's daddy. It was really great. I was so glad that Todd stuck around post drama (caused by his girlfriend). Drama, thank god I didn't move in with them. Oy vey. So I had a great time, then we all split up. And I wish I had stayed with Steph, cuz I just love hanging out with her, and the pub wasn't what it used to be. So, pretty soon after hanging out at the pub with some cool new friends, Kyle and his lady-she is neat, and Danielle and her girlfriend who are both kewl ladies and we are all gonna be bestest friends, we all left. I drove down to PB and met up with Sarah. We danced at this great club and when the place closed I drove home, and probably shouldn't have. Wow, that was just Friday.

Rejection.

Chicago boy - nick - the supposed "wood salesman" - (when I heard that I laughed) - who was so excited to see me, well, he never called. I don't know what happened. It doesn't matter. I have other shit to do. Although, it makes me not really want to look forward to anything... ever. At least with a boy.

Aaron stood me up. I’m over it. He’s the roommate, by the by. I gave him a guilt trip and feel like he's not even there for me as a friend. I should be able to depend on my friends. Anyway, he doesn't want to put any effort into being my friend, than I won't put any effort into being his. Though I feel like I’m constantly cleaning up after him.

I’m exhausted because of last night, which I’m not really ready to talk about. I was sexually assaulted we could say. It was not a good morning. I feel all fucked up about it. I’m starting to feel complete distrust toward men.

Shit. I have got to go to work in a few hours.